A Critic’s Review Of General Hospital: Bah Humbug, Breakups & Triangles

When it comes to General Hospital, every fan has their own opinion – and Soap Hub is no different. For five days, we sat and watched the good, the bad, and everything in between, and now we offer you a handy review, and a cheeky critique, of the GH week that was.

General Hospital: A Critic’s Personal Highlight

Not that you’ve ever asked, but one of my all-time favorite Family Guy cutaways features Peter Griffin discovering the majesty that is Lionel Richie’s Can’t Slow Down album and tearfully wondering who it was that so hurt the crooner.

Personally, I’d like to know who it was that so hurt, nay, who so devastated General Hospital head honchos Chris and Dan/Dan and Chris that their once again celebrating “the most wonderful time of the year” by murdering an innocent — in 2021 it was poor wee Liam, in 2022 it’s Officer Rory Cabrera (Michael Kruse) — and going out of their way to break up not one but two of their most popular pairings — ‘Nava’ and ‘Chalynn’.

Oh, and they’re also slowly killing Willow Tait (Katelyn MacMullen) with “I don’t want anybody to know that I’m dying from leukemia”-itis. Just the sort of storylines that you want to slug through in December.

Further GH Musings

* Alas poor Rory, we hardly knew ye…and I mean that literally. What did we know about him other than the fact that he was created to A) beef up the PCPD and B) serve as an impediment to ‘Sprina’? Oh, that’s right, he likes comic books, and last week we found out that he comes from a large family. Oh, and apparently, he was a patrol officer extraordinaire. Thanks for that bit of character padding Jordan Ashford (Tanisha Harper)! But other than all that…yeah, I got nothing.

* I get that there’s an unspoken, unwritten rule that either Sonny Corinthos (Maurice Benard) and/or Carly Spencer (Laura Wright) must eventually be insinuated into every featured storyline, but if the former had to cannibalize Liesl Obrecht’s (Kathleen Gati) moment with Nina Reeves (Cynthia Watros), wouldn’t it have made more sense for him to liken Britt Westbourne’s (Kelly Thiebaud) wasting away with Huntington’s to Stone Cates’ decline and untimely death from AIDS, or his sister Courtney’s untimely death from a rare strain of encephalitis rather than elderly Mike Corbin’s battle with Alzheimer’s?

Speaking of Sonny, what does it say about the big bad mobster that five unrelated persons are smuggling exotic animals into Port Charles without his knowledge?

* I know that there was a small contingency of General Hospital fans out there who suspected that Rory might be The Hook, but with his murder, I think it’s safe to say that now the only viable suspect — and I use the word ‘viable’ very, very loosely — is Heather Webber (Alley Mills). She’s got the means to escape her confines at Spring Ridge — and one can presume she also had the run of the place at D’Archam — and having a relationship with a dealer who specializes in the exotic would go a long way in explaining how she contacted that rainforest based, flesh-eating bacteria that Hamilton Finn (Michael Easton) treated.

It’s a cop out to be sure, but I can’t think of any other alternatives — the Deputy Mayor in league with Victor Cassadine (Charles Shaughnessy)…the ADA who prosecuted Trina Robinson (Tabyana Ali) — that wouldn’t be equally as disappointing.

* So, Nikolas Cassadine (Marcus Coloma) has told Ava Jerome Cassadine (Maura West) one whopper of a lie in the hopes of keeping her in the dark about a scheme that he’s cooked up that could, and probably will, go off the rails at any moment…if I’m not mistaken, this is just a retread of the not at all reviled Spencer/Trina/Esme storyline.

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