General Hospital: Gross In The Afternoon

The Soap Hub staff really needs to stop eating lunch while watching General Hospital, because lately things have been a bit too much.

It was creepy enough when Nelle (Chloe Lanier) drugged Sonny (Mauice Benard), stripped down to her skivvies, and slipped into bed with him–only to display an even creepier smile in the morning light. But, apparently, that was child’s play.

Last week, we learned New York City likely has the absolute skeeviest OBGYN office in the country–complete with Nurse Ratched. In that cold and hollow exam room with Nurse Ratched watching on, Maxie (Kirsten Storms) underwent a completely unnecessary internal examination just to be a decoy for BFF Lulu (Emme Rylan).

Sorry, we do love our besties here at SH, but we’re not sure we’d go that far for them–TWICE. Yes, we cringed as Maxie asked the doctor to go on in there again, just to be sure she wasn’t pregnant as Lulu recited the alphabet in search of files.

 

We definitely would rather see Port Charles OB’s cause Dr. Lee’s exam room where Jason and Sam watched a sonogram was SO much more pleasant.

The next day, back in NYC, Maxie and Lulu were locked in the exam room by the Cassadine-hired OB and decided they needed weapons–namely some cold and hopefully sterile speculums. No, GH, just no.

But wait–it gets better. After watching Nina (Michelle Stafford) talk about being “sexed up” left, right, up, and down to one of her employees (poor Dillon–can he sue for sexual harrassment?), we went back to the OB office and had to learn…continue reading on the next page —>

Continue reading on the next page…

But wait–it gets better. After watching Nina (Michelle Stafford) talk about being “sexed up” left, right, up, and down to one of her employees (poor Dillon–can he sue for sexual harrassment?), we went back to the OB office and had to learn how Valentin (James Patrick Stuart) became Charlotte’s father rather than Stavros.

Rather than just creating some backstory that Valentin had some sperm stored in a sperm bank somewhere that Helena could get her hands on, the writers instead concocted some more ick by having Valentin seduced by Daphne–who promptly collected some of the afterbits (for lack of a better word) and got it to Helena before the sperm died off.

Really, GH? REALLY? Did that really need to become part of this already bizarre story? Couple that with Franco (Roger Howarth) sticking Tom in a dog crate by the end of the day, and we really might choose to starve in the afternoon rather than eat and watch.

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