Abe Carver Married His Fake Wife In A Fake Ceremony Full of Fake Guests

On today’s Days of our Lives, Abe Carver found himself roped into quite the scene, exchanging vows with this “wife”, surrounded by a plethora of stuffed kitties.

Days of our Lives Recap Highlights

In addition, Paulina (Jackée Harry) put her best face on, Leo (Greg Rikaart) put Megan (Miranda Wilson) on blast — not that she really noticed — Dimitri (Peter Porte) put Gwen (Emily O’Brien) on the spot, and Gabi (Camila Banus) and Stefan put Julie (Susan Seaforth Hayes) on the defensive. Now, let’s dig a little deeper into what exactly happened.

Days of our Lives: Amnesiac Abe Carver Is Played For A Fool

Try as she might, “Paulina” — really nutty nurse Whitley (Kim Coles) — just couldn’t convince Abe (James Reynolds) that he was merely discombobulated and in desperate need of a lie-down. No, Abe was convinced that the woman standing before him was a lying liar who was lying through her teeth [which she totally is, GO ABE!].

But, what was the reason for his accusation? Turns out he’d had a flash of memory from his wedding day — when he and the bride jumped the broom — “And, that bride definitely wasn’t you.”

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Whitley swore that it was she. She’s Paulina. Mrs. Abe Carver. They are totally married. Show me a picture, demanded Abe. Whitley hemmed and hawed and told half-truths and then lied her tuchus off. First, she relayed the disaster that was “their” reception, AKA Lani (Sal Stowers) confessing to murder. And oh, by the way, Abe has a son and a daughter [poor Brandon winds up forgotten in favor of Theo].

Next, she told Abe of a great fire that purged them of most of their worldly possessions. All their precious memories, POOF! Up in puff of smoke. And, of course, there was a logical reason why she couldn’t just phone up Chanel (Raven Bowens) and get her to send pictures of the ceremony. Not enough gigabytes and all that.

Unfortunately for Whitley, Abe stood firm. He wanted proof — cold hard proof that she is who she says she is. After taking a deep inhale, Whitley put her Photoshopping skills to good [bad?] use and dummied up a photo of her and Abe on “their” joyous day.

With no other recourse, Abe apologized profusely. How could he make it up to “Paulina”? Why, renew our vows, of course, declared Whitley, who then proceeded to arrange her stuffed pals all around the living, hunt out her Sunday best, and make Abe slip a ring on her finger. Yes, it was as crazy [and hilarious; “Catti LaBelle”? WHAT?!] as it sounds.

Days of our Lives Recap: All About Abe Carver

Across town, Paulina’s loved ones rallied around her and attempted to imbue her with their collective strengths. After saying her goodbyes to Julie and Eli (Lamon Archey), Paulina asked Theo (Cameron Johnson) to tell her all about the Juneteenth celebration, and he happily obliged. The reminiscence was caped by the gifting of a homemade quilt from one of Abe’s most ardent supporters.

Sometime later, after pouring through her wedding album with Chanel, Paulina sat alone and read a copy of the vows Abe spoke to her on that day. Tears flowed freely.

Days of our Lives Recap: Opposing Counsel

Over at the DiMera mansion, Megan touched base with her partner-in-crime and was less than thrilled that Li (Remington Hoffman) hadn’t made any progress in locating Dr. Rolf (Richard Wharton). Equally disconcerting was having to admit that she hadn’t yet figured out when or where or even how she’d snuff out troublesome Stefan, but such a time would eventually present itself.

The irony of ironies, no sooner had Megan assured Li that EJ (Dan Feuerriegel) and Kristen (Stacy Haiduk) were securely locked away nice and tight and would be unable to sabotage their efforts than the door to the tunnels opened wide. Fortunately, it was merely Leo who came to shout the odds.

He’d rumbled Megan and her dastardly son’s scheme, he declared, and that was to launder the latter’s soiled reputation by manipulating Gwen into writing glowing pieces in The Spectator — and thanks to Dimitri’s “hot-guy black magic,” it was working perfectly.

A tickled Megan put in a modicum of effort to convince Leo that her son AKA “bootylicious Voldemort” [Leo’s description, not hers], was just being his naturally charismatic and charming and that there was no scheme. Leo didn’t much believe Megan, and Megan didn’t much care.

Before taking his leave, Leo came to a startling conclusion: Megan gives him the heebie-jeebies because she so reminds him of his own mother, another “conniving bitch on wheels” who has only a passing acquaintance with the truth.

But, while Leo can’t muster up a kind word for Megan, a visiting Theo found her quite delightful and opined that she wasn’t really as scary as everyone made her out to be. And just like that, Theo became Megan’s favorite kin.

Days of our Lives Recap: United States

Elsewhere, the hotel room she shares with Leo to be exact, Gwen was flummoxed when Dimitri not only suggested that they end their professional relationship immediately and pursue a personal one instead, but that they go the whole hog and marry one another!

Before Gwen could really wrap her head around the line of bull that Dimitri was selling [he’d never believed in love at first sight until he met her, oh how he’s fallen so hard and so deep in love with her — and so quickly too; he never does that] in barreled Leo to put a stop to whatever was going on between the pair.

He was disgusted to find the two in bed together — less so by the vision that Dimitri was. Dimitri bid Gwen consider his ask, then took his leave. Gwen did not thank Leo for his interruption. Leo didn’t much care.

Days of our Lives Recap: Delayed Gratification

In the Horton Town Square, Stefan (Brandon Barash) and Gabi forwent wedding planning to grouse about EJ and the sneak attack that he was probably planning as they spoke. Stefan floated the idea of using EJ’s absence to make inroads with Megan, but Gabi hedged — she recognizes that Megan is a woman with an agenda all her own.

Prior to decamping for home, the couple took time to rile Julie and Eli [who just couldn’t wrap their heads around Stefan being proud of the underhanded tactics that Gabi employed during his absence. #Heartgate] up. What fun that was.

Upon entering the manse, the two overheard Megan and Dimitri discussing wedding plans [his and Gwen’s, because of course she’s going to say yes, natch], necessitating some quick thinking on Megan’s part. “We are going to throw the two of you an engagement party,” she eventually declared. Also, “This is going to be going to be a night that you’ll never forget.”

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